Levels Of Happiness
Levels of Happiness
Happiness, highly treasured and diligently sought after, tints and colors all aspects of our life. We will go to extremes in our search for happiness, but for many humans this essential element remains rather elusive. We thirst deeply for it but many times it remains just beyond our grasp - we hope that with a little more effort in the right direction we may be able to claim this slippery delicacy.
Many hundreds of years ago philosophers came up with a principle that could be viewed as a basic building block in the quest for happiness. It is called the pleasure principle and states: Humans are motivated to maximize pleasure and minimize pain.
According to this principle, basic human behavior is controlled primarily by pleasure and pain. This principle seems to imply that pleasure and pain define the basic building blocks in one's search for happiness, but is this necessarily true? Is everything we do in our search for happiness the result of finding pleasure and avoiding pain. What is happiness and what must one do to obtain it?
Dan is wealthy and active. He is dynamic and prospering in his career. He takes great pleasure in driving his new Mercedes, living in his beautiful home and receiving the power and respect that being a successful lawyer brings. Dan has more of the things that money and prestige can bring than the average guy. There is happiness in his life when he has time to drive his car, time to savor the luxuries of his home, time to enjoy the benefits that money can bring into his life, or successfully negotiating another difficult case, etc.. He seems to have it all.
But, Dan many times also feels empty, anxious, angry, driven - there seems to be something missing. When he feels unpleasant feelings, he dives into his work, finds something to play at, or of late, he finds himself drinking a little more than he is comfortable with. If the pleasure principle is true and brings complete happiness, what is wrong with Dan?
Steven Reiss, PhD, and his class of graduates recently did research on 6000 people to determine what makes people happy. To better explain their findings regarding happiness, Dr. Reiss and his group came up with the conclusion that there are two levels of happiness: (1) "feel good" happiness and (2) "value based" happiness. One interesting fact that came out of their study was that people can be in pain and still be happy, a contradiction of the pleasure principle.
"Feel good" happiness can be described as a highly pleasurable feeling of happiness, but rather shallow in that it rarely touches the inner areas of our spirit. It usually is time limited and usually lasts for a number of hours (not days). Some examples of this form of happiness could be a good meal, a good conversation, a purchase of some desired item, a surprise birthday party etc. It could be compared to the waves on the ocean, foaming, moving, changing and susceptible to the elements.
"Value based" happiness is deeper and longer lasting. Examples of this happiness could be studying a topic that you are interested in(maybe taking a class), putting together a long term physical fitness program, learning to be more self sufficient, spending more time making your family happy, promoting a good cause, and perhaps developing more virtuous habits. This expression of happiness could be compared to the tides that move the ocean. They are more predictable, longer lasting, and less affected by sudden changes in weather (life situations). This level of happiness can endure pain for a specific goal such as preparing for and actually climbing a mountain. It has a longer term time frame, it looks to the end of something and therefore can endure painful situations in the short term. It knows that when the goal is reached that good feelings will also come.
"Feel good" happiness can bring intense and very pleasurable feelings into our life. What a sense of happiness we get when someone important to us remembers our birthday, or when we have a good meal with good friends. One of the problems with "feel good" happiness is immediately obvious - it doesnÇt have any lasting power, it only lasts for hours. It also takes more and more of the things that make up this happiness to get the same emotional high. It is the sugar and frosting but very little of the cake. Most of us would like to somehow maintain the feelings of happiness that we experience from "feeling good" happiness but alas they are fleeting, subject to the day to day fluctuations of life - they also condition one to a shallow level of existence that leaves one thirsting for something deeper and more satisfying.
"Value based" happiness holds more promise for long term happiness. It can be very satisfying to become involved in some good causes and make a difference in oneÇs culture or the lives of other individuals, to work hard and find success in oneÇs career, or bring more happiness, tranquility, and satisfaction to your family life. This longer term outlook can help one endure unpleasant circumstances since it is not the day to day problems that define this happiness, it is the achievement of the goal. One problem with "value based" happiness is that it requires that you have a great deal of control over your life. It is imperative that one can orchestrate his or her life situations to include the elements that leads to this form of happiness. For example, if oneÇs goal is to be a doctor, one must be able to come up with the money, possess the aptitude, commitment and time to realize this goal. Trying to find time and resources to sculpture our life situations in a way that promotes this type of happiness can be challenging and many times simply not within our control. We all, to some degree, believe that we have more control of our life than we really have. These illusions of control are exposed when something unexpected happens that changes our life and frustrates our finest efforts to control events - unexpected slow down in the area that affects our career, financial reverses, relationship problems, the unexpected death of someone close to us, a serious injury and the list goes on and on and on. Life is bigger than us and is therefore many times uncertain and at times dangerous. With our finite abilities we are many times at the mercy of circumstances. Taking responsibility for our actions is a good thing, but if our happiness is dependant on our ability to control lifeÇs circumstances we are in a very fragile position. No wonder we worry and fear events of life. This fear can be exaggerated by our own irrational beliefs but at times it is real. If everything goes according to plan, and we try hard, "value based" happiness is attainable to some degree but one major slip and . . . .
Jill has never been a highly motivated individual but has a good degree of fortitude. She has a good blue collar job that affords her some creature comforts, in particular she enjoys eating out ("feel good" happiness), walking and staying fit ("value based" happiness), and working at developing close friendships with some people ("value based" happiness). In addition Jill made a real change in her life several years ago. Through church attendance, some concerned Christian friends, and a study of the Bible, Jill gave control of her life to the Christian God defined in the Bible ("Divine guidance" happiness). This made a rather remarkable change in Jill.
"Divine guidance" happiness is what I believe to be a third level of happiness. It promotes a very long term outlook on life as it extends into eternity. It is not so much concerned about the immediate but is concerned about the path one is on that leads into the distant future. It doesnÇt settle for a quick fix but a proper path that leads to eternal life. It is unique to committed Christians since it necessitates a close, personal dependence (trust) on God as defined by the Bible. Incomplete forms of it can be found in other religions but only the Christian world view shows it in its completeness. "Divine guidance" happiness can be developed by placing oneÇs complete self in the care and guidance of God. It necessitates the belief by man, that God has manÇs basic good at heart, that God is very powerful, that He knows what is right, and that He wants a personal friendship with man.
Since "divine guidance" happiness is tied to the Christian faith, we need to look at the underling principles of the Christian religion to better understand this form of happiness. The original man and woman were very secure and happy as they lived face to face with God. There was no fear, dread, conflict, anger, etc. They were in perfect harmony with God, each other, themselves, and their environment. Through a tragic choice, man and woman fell from this incredible, unimaginable, constant state of tranquility and happiness. In an instant they went from ecstacy to despair. They were not designed to "go it on their own", fear clutched at their heart and all they wanted to do was hide from God and the new dangerous life they faced without God to protect and guide them. A need tells us that something is missing from our life. The original humans didnÇt feel a need for security, meaning, purpose, and happiness since God was providing directly for them (their needs were being met by God). They had no way of knowing, before their fateful act of disobedience and rejection, that life could change so radically. After their rejection of GodÇs instructions they felt needs that they didnÇt realized existed. This must have been an overwhelming experience.
"Divine guidance" happiness requires that man be dependent on God. This dependence on God is healthy. Jill found that God is able to adequately care for her, He has only the very best intentions for her. She at times wondered where He was in her life, but she trusted Him to work it out even if she didnÇt understand. She concluded that to tell God how to run her life was to place herself on His level - one look at the night sky showed her that this was improbable. She concluded that it was rather ludicrous for her to tell God how He should act so she would view Him as a good and caring God. His job was to manipulate life to her good. Her job was to accept whatever life dished out because she was secure in His will. It is a comforting feeling knowing that there is a Being in whom we can trust and feel secure. It is also a little scary to trust someone else for our well being and happiness. This is the test - trust.
Jill had the faith to take this God at His word and it had a major impact of her life. She found that He is big enough to unselfishly care for her, smart enough to be a perfect guide, and strong enough to protect her and correct her when necessary. Her happiness was rooted in the fact that she was a daughter of the greatest of all Kings, that loved her enough to die for her, that had a plan for her life (His plan - not her short term, pain sensitive, culturally influenced plan) and that plan included meaningful activity in her life here if she could see the opportunities. He also promised to prepare a place of unimaginable beauty, serenity, happiness, and significant activities after she gave her body back to the Earth.
"Divine guidance" is long term happiness with less intensity than "feeling good" happiness. It is more stable and secure than both "feeling good" and "value based" happiness, perhaps like the depths of the ocean that barely move even when the waves are whipped, and foaming in a storm or the tides exert their pull. Jill was experiencing all three levels of happiness, but she also found that she didnÇt need to relay on "feeling good" and "value based" happiness as much when she had given her life to God. She found that these two levels of happiness help color her life but following close after God gave her a deeper nourishment and sense of well-being that the other two levels of happiness couldnÇt provide.
As with most of the issues one faces in life we really do have a choice. Three levels of happiness (1) "Feeling good", (2) "Value based", and (3) "Divine guidance"- which level or levels are you experiencing in your life at this time. Be honest. Which levels would you choose to develop? Why not start today?
