I Still Have Joy

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials. James 1:2 (NKJV)

On 10th January 2002, I found myself singing a song most part of the day and I wondered what that meant. It was a short song:

I still have joy (2ce)
After all I’ve been through
I still have joy

Initially, I did not understand until later that night. My aunt called me and informed me that my mother was admitted unconscious. I was shaken and at the same time, I found it strange. My mother was such an agile woman although she had mild hypertension. I remembered the song and felt that God was preparing me to receive the news. I did not remember my mother being admitted before. The more I thought of it, the more uneasy I felt. I resolved to travel the next day. I saw my mother the day after and I was torn within; a once agile woman, suddenly helpless.

Two days after, there were signs of improvement and this gave us hope. My father, my brother and I sat down and planned on how to ensure she rested once she was discharged. We thought of ways to reduce her workload and we agreed she would go for a holiday.

Some days later, we noticed she was deteriorating. On the 19th, I saw her and I was worried, but her friend who came visiting at the hospital encouraged me to walk by faith and not by sight. So I went to bed that night believing that all would be well. My mother passed on that night, 19th January 2002.

When I heard it, I found myself crying and at the same time praising God. I remembered the song I sang the day she was admitted and thought to myself, “God was actually preparing me for her death.”

It has been a rough journey without her but God has been with us. Indeed I still have joy.

Father, I thank you that despite what we face in life, you are still faithful. You do not abandon us; rather you are in it with us. Amen.